5/10

Here is the plot summary:

Talk talk talk talk talk exposition talk talk talk exposition talk talk talk CGI PLANE CRASH talk talk argue talk exposition argue talk talk argue drive talk drive CGI TRAIN CRASH drive argue exposition talk argue drive argue talk argue drive CGI SPACE SHIP talk talk EARTH IS TOASTED ... pretty and curiously SF style ending.

Once again, if they'd cut about 30 minutes of dumb exposition, links, two incongruous CGI smash-ups, bland dialogue and mundane second unit shots out of this overlong mess they could have made a cult movie. It was just so long and so little happened so slowly, with whizz-bang action scenes thrown in like they had spare computers lying around. It's like someone wanted it padded out with more and more close ups of Nick Cage and his white trash entourage stumbling into the most obvious secret on earth.

Just as an aside: Why oh why do all American film star kids (and TV star kids) have to have little chubby faces with bobby hair? Lord save us from this stereotype, and I notice it's creeping into Australia now.

The stupidest character in the movie was a scientist played by Ben Mendelsohn. Every time Nick tried to tell Ben about some vision or theory of planetary importance, he'd put his hands over his ears and say "I don't want to hear what you're saying". This demonstrates that the writers have not even the vaguest idea about what the scientific method is or how scientists think.

The only part of this movie I will remember is the last 10 minutes. The final images were so startling in their big vision SF purity that I imagine it was some kind of scripting accident. As beautiful as the final scenes of gigantic crystalline folding spaceships, aliens and planetary destruction were, I found myself chuckling a few times.

So this 100 mile long space ship only takes two kids and two white rabbits away from the doomed Earth. Not even Dad (Cage) could go, only those who "heard the message". Yeah, take me too, I heard it, I swear it did!! I hope the hundred other cosmic ships we saw taking off had more passengers. I also hope the lovely new planet they're deposited on has schools, shopping malls and veterinarians, otherwise this planet's going to turn into Lord of The Flies overrun by white rabbits.

With more SF and less monotonous talk talk talk talk talk, this could have been a cult movie. Good try though, and perhaps it will encourage other directors to go a bit further.

Cheers,
Greg

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